I see you tear up every time a new pregnancy is announced.. you feel selfish, because you are wishing that it was you, as well. I see you being envious of that expecting mama you pass in the store, who has that just starting to show bump and glow. It’s so much harder when get pregnant with the first child unexpectedly, but you’re having such a hard time conceiving the second.
I see you silently crying on the inside when people ask when you’re going to have another one. I see you wondering if something is wrong with you, when you aren’t getting pregnant so easily.
I see you mama, feeling defeated when only one line shows up instead of two on that pregnancy test you bought. I see you mama when even though you get a negative test, you buy more because you’re still late, and you’re still hopeful that one will be positive.
I see you mama, trying to be happier than ever for your friends, but when you get home you have a breakdown. You still attend baby showers, you still buy the gifts for your friends, but it’s breaking your heart because you are wishing it was your baby you were buying the gifts for.
I see you mama, because I am you. In so many ways. I AM YOU. I am that mama who wants so bad to give her little girl a sibling. I have the names picked out. I have the nursery design on a Pinterest board. I am also, that mama, that it just isn’t happening right now.
I cannot tell you how long I have prayed for another sibling for my child.. I cannot tell you how much money I’ve spent on pregnancy test in just this last year.. hoping I would get one that says, you’re pregnant!
I know that when it does happen, that baby will feel so much love! But I cannot help to feel envious of all you mamas to those sweet precious, newborn babies.
At this season in life, I just know it’s not God’s plan for me. I so wish more than anything it was. But until then, I am still cheering you mamas on. I’m still praying for you mamas who also are having a hard time conceiving.. & I’m rooting for you mamas, who keep adding to your sweet little families. ♥️
If you’ve made it this far, Lord I pray for the person reading this. I pray you show them mercy lord, I pray you answer their prayers lord. I pray they are able to conceive soon lord. I pray it’s your will to grant them the wish of motherhood. If the person reading this is expecting I pray you let them have a happy healthy pregnancy. For all you new mamas, I pray, for you strength. I pray for your patience, and most importantly I pray excellent health for your littles.
I love you all. & I hope you all had the sweetest Easter. ♥️